“I’m the last splash…”

I know you, little libertine
I know you’re a cannonball
I’ll be you’re whatever you want
The bong in this Reggae Song

Yesterday my computer died. The video card decided that it had enough of Second Life and Halo so it just told me to fuck off and it died. Early in the morning as well. It was survived by my sound card who mocked me relentlessly as it played sound and the rest of my computer parts. Panicked, I called Binx and told him my computer died. He asked what the problem was, I said the video card as I noticed a decline of videos and gaming capabilities. He wasn’t so sure until I continued telling him it couldn’t be anything else because everything else works. Later on in the day, I bought another on loan because I have sans money and I haven’t gotten paid yet. My pathetic life seems a little more pathetic.

My computer’s up again and happy. The video card I have now is better than my last one and it cost less as well, so yay for me. I even picked it out, showing that I’m lucky when I randomly point at things that I haven’t the slightlest clue of.

After Binx installed the video card, we sat around talking and as we were talking I started realizing that it’s my self destructive behavior that causes a lot of the my relationships or would be relationships to fail miserably. And it’s also my self destructive behavior that makes me decided the wrong choices and what paths to take. It depressed me last night that I even realize that my alter ego – well, my alter ego’s alter ego – has grown too big for a virtual world and the failed experiment has been realized as not a failed experiment at all. So with that said, I think I’m going to go figure out who I am again.

I speak religion’s message clear
and I control you
I am denial guilt and fear
and I control you
I am the prayers of the naive
and I control you
I am the lie that you believe
and I control you
I take you where you want to go
I give you all you need to know
I drag you down I use you up
Mr. Self-destruct
(you let me do this to you. i am an exit)
I am the needle in your vein

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