Some need diamonds, some need love
Some need cards, some need luck
A piece of me is missing and I’m afraid that I’m hurting those who love me. I vanished this weekend as I always vanished when I refuse to be a man. Sometimes it’s easier to run than to stay because the weight of the problem can be too much. But a man can only run so far before he encounters that the problem has followed him. Where do you run after that? I’ve been thinking of escape. Ohio? El Senor will be going there this December. But can I part from those who have made me happy? Is the Valley done with me? Am I done with the Valley? It’s time like this that I wish I had an addiction to fall back on. To numb the pain. To drown the depression with the depression. To smother out the fire by starting another. To take the taste of metal rather than the taste of wine.
Now the neighborhood’s cracked and torn
The kids are grown up but their lives are worn
How can one little street
Swallow so many lives?
I was listening (and singing along to) this song on the way home from Waco. I love the song. Replace street with city and you have Edinburg.
A lot of people have tried to convince me to leave the Valley and move to Austin, TX as if there is some unknown utopia that I’m not aware of smack in the middle of capital city. I called Philosopher there on my way to Waco. I missed her and the first phone call was cut short due to The Professor’s phone call. The city is overwhelmingly familiar. Austin, TX, I am convinced, is the Rio Grande Valley smashed into a city. The vile people there carry a stench that pollutes the air. It’s a cancer far worse than that of the Valley. I hate it.
And while my original intention was to bash Austin and San Antonio, I mentioned Philosopher and I can’t write anything I was going to write before. Alas, that is the life of a person who writes these things off the top of his head.
Only you and I,
only you and I, my love,
listen to it.
The thought of returning to the Valley never sounded so sweet. I love the fact that I’ll be there eight hours after we leave Waco. I’ll see the sights of Austin and San Antonio once again, smelling the stink of both cities. But I will return to you, my home, my Boroughs. I will see the skies and feel the humidity and I will hate it. But your sorrowful song will be music to my ears as finally I shall belong in my surroundings.
And now that things have been sussed out, I’m happy to know that when I get home, my smile will be genuine.
So I packed two changes of clothes. My jeans, today’s clothes, comically deteriorated, leave a stain of blue fuzz on The Professor’s floor on which I lied because of a backache.
We drove to the local IHOP and it was packed to kingdom come. We went to another IHOP and it too was packed, leaving me to say, “Maybe if we go somewhere less white.” We wound up at a Mexican restaurant where I ate Migas. Afterwards, we ventured TSTC and then the Dr. Pepper Museum where I realized white people have way too much time on their hands, also leaving me never wanting to drink another Dr. Pepper – or should I say, Waco (as that’s what they call it here, supposedly) again. Truth be told, the whole museum left me wanting a Mountain Dew as they said it was imitation of their beloved 7 Up.
Again, we decided it was time to eat. We had lunch at the Headstead something or the other, run by a very nice bunch of Mennonites. Mennonites, by the way, are far more interesting, caring and kind than any other religious bunch I’ve thus far met.
No one likes to take a test
Sometimes you know more is less
Put your weight against the door
Kick-drum on the basement floor
Stranded in a fog of words
Loved him like a winter bird
On my head the water pours
Gulf stream through the open door
Woke up four minutes until seven and I feel oddly refreshed. However, my back – probably from the car ride over – is killing me. I also realize that my pain medication for my knee is sitting nicely at my desk back home. Go me! As long as I take periodic breaks between walking, I should be okay.
Yup, 25 years-old and already I have a pain. Oh well, son cosas de la vida.
On today’s menu: Baylor University. What can an Atheist and an Agnostic possibly find there? Oh what fun it will be to finally do something interesting.
We arrived around 12:30am and we’re beat up the midnight disease has me and El Senor in its grasp. And while I’m miles away from home, my mind is still there – or perhaps that metaphorical heart. Currently, I’m using The Professor’s computer while El’s watching Trainspotting.
This post will be short and to the point. I miss you already. I’m not a romantic and I don’t think that a post will prove anything. I just thought you’d like to know.
Road trippin’ with my two favorite allies
Fully loaded we got snacks and supplies
It’s time to leave this town
It’s time to steal away
Let’s go get lost
Anywhere in the U.S.A.
Okay, we’re only going to Waco, but the point is, I’m going to be on the road. And while the two people I’m going with are two of my favorite people (Jyg and El Senor), they aren’t the only people I hold in high regards. No, some of you will be staying behind and I will miss you dearly (namely Philosopher as she’s the only one I know who lives here and has a WordPress).
Speaking of Waco, believers have the strangest rituals. I’m not saying you all do this, but you know you have this one thing that raises an eyebrow or two.
I’m scattered brain today. Jyg woke me up way too early for comfort. She didn’t sneak into my room or anything, she just woke me out of the sweetest dream, which caused me to think rapidly and wonder why these dreams have been taking over my night in the last few weeks.
Let’s go get lost
Let’s go get lost
Blue you sit so pretty
West of the one
Sparkle light with yellow icing
Just a mirror for the sun
Just a mirror for the sun
Just a mirror for the sun
These smiling eyes are just a mirror for
These smiling eyes are just a mirror for
Your smiling eyes are just a mirror for
I’m walking down a lonely road
Clear to me now but i was never told
Trouble with dreams is you never know
When to hold on and when to let go
About a month ago, I started making fun of Philosopher about her addiction to Second Life. Now I find myself slowly getting addicted to it. I suppose it’s the whole experiencing things in another world that you can’t in this one. I mean, how many times can you actually go to hell and live to tell about it?
This weekend will be the trip to Waco so I can see my friend The Professor. [Note: for you new readers, I never use anyone's real name unless I don't know them, or that I feel more people should know them. Depending on the link and the person, real names can be acquire.] Now the count is up to El Senor, Jyg and myself as the other guest has been rumored out of the trip. Thankfully, however, El is in the process of acquring his brother’s VW so we don’t have to worry about A/C.
And hopefully soon, there will be a trip to Cali because this city and state is eating me alive. El’s working on his thesis on author Larry Fondation. Fondation was down last week and I accompanied El to his reading. The man is beyond a writer. Hopefully, if all goes well, El and I will be visiting Fondation next month and I’ll write about that as well.
rating: 5 of 5 stars There probably isn't anything I can say about this book that hasn't been said already. With that said, read it if you haven't already.
